Sunday, July 11, 2010

Meet The Press with Robert Gibbs - July 11, 2010

July 11, 2010
Guests:
Robert Gibbs (White House Press Secretary)
Rachel Maddow
Harold Ford
Ed Gillespie
David Brooks
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Gregory: Bob how is the inability to stop the
BP oil gusher going?

Gibbs: well we still haven’t been able to do anything about it but we built this nifty shoe-phone

Gregory: are you confident in BP’s handling
of the situation

Gibbs: I’ve never met a bigger bunch of schmucks - and I worked on transition from the
Bush administration

Gregory: Obama says Republicans created the
mess that is the Obama administration

Gibbs: that’s right

Gregory: people think America is on the wrong track

Gibbs: in the last 6 months of 2008 the US lost 3 million jobs and now Obama is finally creating jobs

Gregory: yeah but things are still bad

Gibbs: Obama is going to visit the plant that supplies the batteries for the Mitt Romney 2000

Gregory: yeah but people can’t buy new overpriced homes and Politico says the stimulus was a communist conspiracy

Gibbs: let me repeat - Bush wrecked the economy and Obama is finally getting us out of the
damm ditch!

Gregory: but the debt!

Gibbs: was created by Republicans!

Gregory: you have to own all these problems

Gibbs: don’t drive the car into the ditch and demand the keys when we’re back on the road

Gregory: you’ve got an answer for everything

Gibbs: damm right Fluffy

Gregory: Democrats are localizing these races - doesn’t this prove Obama is a bad President

Gibbs: Hey Greggers did you know Republicans think the recent Depression was no big deal?

Gregory: but but but on the other hand I hate Obama

Gibbs: I heard you were a moron

Gregory: I don’t get it

Gibbs: all politics is local Dancin’ Dave

Gregory: Is Obama a failure or do people
expect too much?

Gibbs: We inherited a shitload of problems but I’m telling you we’re going to win in Afghanistan and then get the hell out!

Gregory: Is Obama going to raise taxes?

Gibbs: hell yeah - the rich didn’t even need those fucking tax cuts

Gregory: what will it take to bring back the
housing bubble?

Gibbs: it won’t come back as long as we’re still
in a recession

Gregory: which was caused by the housing crisis

Gibbs: well maybe those irresponsible buyers should move out of their house

Gregory: but they’re underwater

Gibbs: well according to Al Gore we all will be soon

Gregory: but the housing market

Gibbs: will come back when the economy recovers

Gregory: terrific

Gibbs: see it all makes sense

Gregory: Should I be terrified of hot red-headed Russian spies?

Gibbs: I was not terribly impressed with the idiots - it was like George W. Bush was running an international spy ring

Gregory: Obama escalated in Afghanistan and kept the state secrets privilege and went after Iran and North Korea - he’s just like Bush

Gibbs: that’s bullshit

Gregory: yes but my stupid predicate is that you
are just like Bush

Gibbs: and my answer is that you are the dumbest character on television and I include the entire
cast of Jersey Shore

Gregory: is the House in Jeopardy and please answer in the form of a question

Gibbs: it is if people want to spend the next two years apologizing to BP and Wall Street

Gregory: Would Obama trade the Cavaliers to
North Korea for nuclear weapons

Gibbs: that’s a good idea Fluff

[ break ]

Brooks: a month ago I felt the American people were happy but now I think the people hate Obama because worried about their grandchildren

Gregory: Sharron Angle is a serious economic thinker

Maddow: sure this election could be about if you are unhappy with the economy or it can be about that Sharron Angle is out of her fucking mind

Gillespie: pointing out that Republicans are insane only proves that Obama is a partisan and that he doesn’t care about jobs

Ford: we can’t dwell on the failures and crimes of
the past - if we are hemorrhaging jobs we need to cut spending and cut taxes

Gregory: it’s amazing you are unemployed

Maddow: I would like to subscribe to Harold Ford’s newsletter

Gregory: Why is Obama so mean pointing out all the mistakes of Republicans??

Maddow: Republicans are irresponsible spenders and also they fail at everything

Brooks: Republicans terrify the hell out of me

Gregory: that goes without saying

Brooks: we’re in a crisis created by Republicans which makes this a conservative moment

Gregory: good god even I think you’re a hack

Gillespie: Obama is going to raise taxes!

Maddow: you’re ranting about the debt and then you want to cut taxes

Ford: my point is cutting taxes and raising spending is really popular

Maddow: but it causes total public disasters

Ford: that is not my problem Rachel

Gregory: California and Illinois are bankrupt -
I mean it’s a real problem

Brooks: we should extend unemployment but it didn’t happen because the GOP opposes it and Democrats won’t give them all they want

Gillespie: why would you hire a new employee when you don’t know if health care reform will be enacted

Gregory: it was enacted you idiot

Gillespie: really?

Gregory: Peggy Noonan says Obama should give every American a Magic Dolphin

Ford: the reality is if America was going to elect a black President it should have been me

Maddow: oh sure

Ford: Gov. Christie is doing an awesome job

Maddow: truly you have a dizzying intellect

Gregory: Rachel you were just in Afghanistan and trying to figure out what the hell we are doing there

Maddow: we’re trying to create an Afghan government and our deadline concentrates the mind

Brooks: that deadline was too cute - but I was a strong supporter of the war and even I think we may have to leave if things don’t turn around in 10 years

Gillespie: The Bad Guys will wait us out - we need to stay until we Get The Job Done

Maddow: Honestly I don’t think spouting third-grade Hollywood gibberish is going win the war and create peace in that far off land

Gillespie: it’s all we’ve got

Gregory: and that’s the last word

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